Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Vigilante Undecorating.

Good afternoon!

This past weekend, Peaches and her friends had a rummage sale at the house.  I'm not telling you this because I want to advertise the fact that you missed a rummage sale at my house or the fact that four teenage girls and their endless stream of fellow teens poured through my house for three solid days and I'm only just now, on Tuesday, starting to feel like I don't live in an episode of "Hoarders meets Facts of Life."

No i'm telling you this because on Sunday it fell to Hubby and me to walk around the neighborhood and take down the signs for the sale.  The girls put them up on old curtain rods, the flimsy metal kind that come in two parts and can slide apart.  Easy to use as a sign post.

While walking around our neighborhood, we noticed something.  Yes, yes, it's April.  It's LATE April.  And it's been seriously nice weather at least a couple days a week for the last several weeks.  And this past weekend the weather was all but PERFECT.  

So why, please tell me, do people still have their CHRISTMAS LIGHTS ON THEIR HOUSES?

I'm not talking about white lights that could be festive all year 'round. I'm not talking about red white and blue lights to celebrate a summer full of patriotic drinking holidays.  Nope, these were icicle lights.  Icicle lights hung poorly, and starting to fall down. (If they were ever hung properly.)

Friends, as we walked by the house, and as I was holding the hooked end of an old curtain rod, a thought occurred.  Of course, Hubby spoke first.  "Hey, you could pull those lights off that house with these."

"Yes,"  I said, "Under cover of darkness, I could spring around the city, removing Christmas lights from homes that look ridiculous with them now that it's APRIL."

Yes, this is EXACTLY what I look like.  There are
hidden slimming panels in my
vigilante costume!
"What, like some kind of vigilante?" he asked, with a touch of fear in his voice.  I'm never quite sure, if he's afraid I'm going to actually do something about the Christmas light nonsense, or if he fears being mentioned in the blog.

"Yes," says I.  "Exactly like a vigilante.  A vigilante undecorater."

Look out Waukesha. There's a new form of law in town!




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