I feel the need

I feel the need

Friday, August 1, 2014

I'm not that fat...you're that stupid.

Good morning!

Due to road construction our work mailbox was moved from the front of our building to a safer location 753 steps away from the office.  Not that I've counted...well, not every day.

I have enjoyed the ten minute walk twice a day because it's a reason to get out of the office for a bit and the weather up here in Wisconsin has been WINNER all summer.  (Sorry, for those of you who love the heat and humidity, this fluffy girl likes her weather like she likes her men:  Bright and cool.)

Because we can't walk on the street, again, due to the construction that will never, ever end, I have to walk through the neighboring parking lot and then up their drive to another parking lot.  The drive is somewhat narrow, bordered by the building and a row of shrubs.  Not really wide enough for two cars, but way wider than one car.

So yesterday I was on my way to the mailbox.  It was a beautiful morning, bright and shiny and lovely. I crossed the parking lot and took a step into the drive when I saw a car also approaching the drive from the opposite end.  I slid over a step closer to the shrubs so that the driver would have enough room to pass.

He didn't pass.

No, instead, he waited at the end of the drive.  Waiting, waiting, waiting as I walked the twenty feet.  As soon as I passed his car, he peeled away like some kind of suburban Dukes of Hazzard.

Whatever Racer X wanted at the building must not have taken very long because on my return trip we again hit a stand off at either end of the drive.  


Maybe I should have given him a signal.
This time I slid closer to the building.  I was, in fact, inside the line of downspouts in a spot of the drive Racer X would NEVER have driven on no matter how narrow the drive.  And still, he waited.  He hovered at the end of the drive, like a...well, like a race car waiting for the green flag.

The minute I passed his car, he again roared through the twenty foot drive like he was escaping something.

I walked back to the office pondering the odd exchange.  I mean, if you could really call it an exchange.  What was the deal with this guy?  Why didn't he just drive past me?  Why did he have to be so dramatic once I was out of the drive?

And then it hit me.

Dude in the fancy car didn't think there was enough room in the drive for both him and...ME!


I'm fluffy, but seriously?  He could EASILY have driven past me at a normal rate of speed without encroaching in my space or damaging his Racer X mobile.  But no, dude had to sit there and stare at me as I walked toward him and then scream out of the drive like I'd made him late for something really important.  I realized Racer X had just informed me, with his noisy departure both times, that my fluffiness was a MAJOR inconvenience for him.

Yeah, okay.  

The world is made up of many people, most of them, I'm starting to realize, are horrible and mean and rude. My promise to you, readers, is that I will find these people and I will report on them for your amusement.

I can't help it...they just seem to find me.

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