Saturday, October 8, 2016

Women communicate in many ways. Men...not so much.

Good morning!

I'm giddy with glee today because tonight I get to spend an EVENING WITH CARY ELWES!

Those of you asking "Who is Cary Elwes and why does Sarah care so much" clearly are not close friends of mine, or have not had an actual conversation with me ever because if you are or if you had, you'd know that my number one number one favorite movie ever is "The Princess Bride" and Cary Elwes is the lead "Westley."  I say IS because let's fact it, actors become their most iconic part forever. Cary Elwes is, was, and always will be Westley.  Sigh. And some friends and I are going down to a fancy theater tonight and watching "The Princess Bride" with Cary.  

Some might suggest that paying money to watch a movie I own in every media form just so I can share a room with 1000 other people, one of whom happens to be the lead actor might be a bit...stupid.

To you I say..."BOOOOOOOO!"

Anyway, before I get fancy and go off to a fantasy world for a couple hours, I have to share this moment of real life with you all.

Let me preface this by saying I read once that girls speak 20000 words in a day while boys speak 7000-8000.  Male communication is far more nonverbal or it's in the form of sound rather than words. I believe after yesterday there is no room for doubt on how valid that stat is.

Yesterday I was running some errands with Peaches and we were wondering what we should do for dinner.  I sent a text to Hubby. He made a suggestion of beer can chicken, which is a family favorite.   the following is our text exchange after we agreed beer can chicken was a good idea.

Hubby:  I'll pick one up on my way home.  Side dish?

Me:  I'm going to Brennan's so I'll find something.

Hubby:  Need me to get the bird?

Me, thinking, "Didn't he just say he was getting the bird?"

Hubby:  ???

Me:  Yes.

Me:  We can make asparagus and corn and I can make some more oven potatoes too.

Hubby:  Ok. Prescriptions are ready at Sam's.

Me, thinking, "What prescriptions?  I haven't had anything called in, and he gets his by mail now."  I check with Peaches, who has not had anything called in. Skippy didn't say anything about a new prescription.  I'm befuddled.  But I have edits to do, it's late in the day, I've just decided I'm going to make a dessert for dinner, and stopping at Sam's is NOT on my to-do list. Frankly, if I'd known I had to stop at Sam's, I would have skipped Brennan's and just gone to Sam's and I would have gotten the chicken.

I share all this with Peaches, and then I wonder if Hubby is telling me about the prescription just as a share of information, or if he wants me to get whatever it is that is there, because sometimes he picks up the meds because he's on his way home or something.  So I have Peaches text back because I'm driving.

Me:  Are you picking them up?

Now at this point I have to drive past Sam's.  We wait. We wait. We wait for a response. And then we drive past Sam's.  And then we're 2/3s of the way home when I get this:

Hubby:  No.

Fantastic.  

See, if he'd said up front that Sam's had a prescription ready for us but he couldn't pick it up I would have skipped Brennan's  (An excellent produce and cheese...and wine...store) and just gone to Sam's and gotten what I needed including the prescriptions.  But he didn't say that. He just said the prescriptions were in.

So now I'm almost home, I've got ten things to do including finishing my final draft of my new novel, "Superhero in Superior, Nora Hill Mystery #2" and running BACK to Sam's seems...stupid.

But I need more information.

Me:  What prescriptions are they?

Hubby:  I don't know. I got a text.

THAT DOES NOT HELP ME.

I mean, depending on who the meds are for, I might be able to wait until tomorrow, right?

Now I'm all the way home. The only person who might have something at this point is Skippy who is home sick. He's been having some stomach/food issues lately. I stick my head into his dark room, something I do not like doing at all.  Turns out yet, his doctor did prescribe something for him. and since it's a new one from the doc he just saw this week, I know I have to go get it.  Of course, I would have been prepared for that HAD HE MENTIONED IT TO ME.

Yet another breakdown in communication with a man in my life.  

So I go back to Sam's.  And I send  the following series of texts to Hubby. Why?  Because I am a woman and I know how to communicate completely:

Me:  I'm at Sam's If you haven't gotten the chicken I may as well.

Me:  But if I don't hear from you in the next ten minutes I'll figure you got it.

Me:  Forget it. I'm here.  I got them.

Me:  Do not get more chicken.

Hubby:  Ok

And thus ended the communication. I got home, exhausted and about two hours behind in the schedule I had for my day.  But we got the meds, I made the dessert.  

And we decided we were too tired to make anything else. So the beer can chicken has to wait until tonight. I'll be spending the evening with Cary Elwes and some of my friends while the clan, Hubby, Skippy, Peaches and Junior (who is up for a visit this weekend) will be enjoying beer can chicken.

 AND, oh yes, Skippy didn't need to take the meds until today.

That's my life. I can't make any of it up. Don't hate me because I'm awesome.

In the end I know Hubby, dear Hubby, is going to read this and say, "HEY! How did I make the blog this week?"  Poor guy. It's all so simple, at least to me, a woman. Had he just put two sentences into the text instead of one, I would have been forced to find a different topic.  




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