I feel the need

I feel the need

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Hey..Tampa! I'll give you the same production for way less!

Hell all!  I'm taking a break for a couple days...I'm up to my eyeballs in Elsie work, and I need a break.  But today news came out that I had to touch on for you.

Over a year ago I wrote what has become, without rival, my most popular blog.  I wrote about how I tried the Albert Haynesworth fitness test, the one he failed with the Redskins, but was signed to a $100 M contract.

Since then, Mr. Haynesworth and I both changed jobs.  I went from office drone to third shifter back to office drone.  He moved to New England where he played six games for the Patriots.

And in those six games, this man was payed $10M for his efforts.

I make $13 and hour, 8 plus hours a day, five days a week, no exceptions.    He played six games.  In a season when there were no off season training camps.  So he and I worked out about as often as the other.

I have zero tackles in the NFL in those six weeks.

Dude, I have 3 fewer tackles
than you!
Albert Haynesworth...for his $10M...has three.  Not three per game.  Three.

That's right.  I have three fewer tackles over six games than a guy making $10M.

This all comes from a report from my sports guru Steve Czaben as heard on The Bob and Brian show.  I never miss that sports report in the AM, and this is why.

Had I known the bar to be an NFL Defensive Lineman was so low, I would have applied with the Patriots instead of Kwik Trip or...you know, the Dunder Mifflin look alike I'm at now.  I would have taken up NO room under the salary cap because I would have played HARD those six games for about 5% of what Mr. Haynesworth did.  I might even have produced the same number of tackles.  Hey, I might look like a broken down middle aged woman, but I could be sneaky.  No one expects the old lady to tackle!

So now, after being unemployed for about 24 hours, Mr. Haynesworth is moving to Tampa where he will "play" for the Buccaneers.

Seriously, Tampa...I'm happy to come on down and fill the spot.  I would love the work out time and honestly, I wouldn't cost nearly as much.  I wouldn't even demand a separate locker room.  I'll just drive home and shower after the games. 

Just putting that out there.

And now I'm back on track.  Nano is riding my tail because my production on writing has been as sporadic as...well as an Albert Haynesworth tackle.  The difference is, I get paid AFTER I produce.

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